presents...

Laverne & Shirley Sing

More fake music from TV land... it's Laverne and Shirley!

It's bad enough that people in the 70s couldn't distinguish between actors and musicians (witness records by the likes of Telly Savalas, Sebastian Cabot, Leonard Nimoy and countless others). Apparently, though, they couldn't tell the difference between real people and fictional characters either. Check out this record of blase quasi-50's tunes by Laverne and Shirley. It's actually actors Penny Marshall and Cindy Williams who sing here, but they stay completely in character, performing as if Laverne and Shirley were real people with their own singing careers.

I hate to be the one to break the news, but Laverne and Shirley aren't real. The songs they sing aren't real. The steps they're sitting on in this picture are inside a Hollywood sound stage, not in downtown Milwaukee. Even their cute ice pops are most likely made out of plastic to avoid dripping on their fake sweaters. Take my advice, throw out your television and buy more records. It's the only path to true elightenment.

Laverne & Shirley Sing
(click picture to magnify)
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Songs:

Sixteen Reasons (MP3) Wherein the girls enumerate the "Sixteen reasons why I love you". I bet they're talking about the Fonz.
More from our Yearbook (MP3) All the names they mention in this song are people who assisted in the production of the album. If you ask me, that's blurring the line between truth and fiction a little too much.

See Also: The Odd Couple Sings, Fonzie, Fonzie, He's Our Man, Themes From Hit TV Shows

Your Comments:

Sir Droopy Drawers says:
Yes, I am back! (and this time I have a computer).
Wouldn't this record sound better with two lesbians moaning? Because I much rather hear that than this crap. Even two lesbians dropping a load in the toilet would sound better than this. Now if you all excuse me, my asylum awaits for me. (11-12-2004)

Mad Dr. Matt (magob@aol.com) says:
Ah-ha! Finally a subject which I can speak about with some authority. I worked on L & S show for about two seasons in the early 80's. The best year was 1980 - when they gave all the "help" these L & S dart-boards made out of a glass mirror (it had Penny & Cindy's mugs plastered on the bulls-eye) for an Xmas gift. It had a little rubber suction-cup dart gun, which we threw away after a while. Then everybody used the thing to chop up coke. You see, coke was the "real thing" in Hollywood at the time. I won't say which of the cast members liked it the best - only because it would be impossible to figure out. Anyway, we probably snorted a luxury automobile's worth of blow off that thing. We were soooo STOO-PID!

The amazing thing about this show was that it was such a big deal at all. I tip my hat to Cindy's and (especially) Penny's talents - but come on! Where were the laughs? Even the cast didn't think the show was funny. Maybe it was the cuteness factor. They WERE cute - for a while. Cindy especially (though totally insane). Cute and wacky. That's IT! Never underestimate the power of cute and WACKY!

At least, the cast had fine table manners, and that goes a long way in my book! In fact, nobody ate much off the food service carts at all...

I wonder why? (11-11-2004)

KERRY & EDWARDS IN '04! says:
VOTE KERRY/EDWARDS! (10-27-2004)

T. Parkes (Thomas_Parkes_638@hotmail.com) says:
I saw your show on physic healing and would like to get in contact with Dean Craft. Please send me his address and phone number. (09-14-2004)

maddy (maidenclytie@yahoo.com) says:
If anyone has any info on how to contact Dr. Craft please e-mail me. My uncle is ill and docters can do nothing for him. (08-24-2004)

LLOYD (LLOYDGARNER@HOTMAIL.COM) says:
JUST HEARD ABOUT DEAN CRAFT AND NEED TO CONTACT HIM TOO-I HAVE ALS. PLEASE ANYONE SEND INFO ON HIM. THANKS!!! (08-16-2004)

Daiquiri St John (daiquiri@earthlink.net) says:
Can either of you tell me where you found this psychic healer Dean Craft ??? I've been thying to find him with no results. A phone number. An email address. Anything. Thank you.

--Daiq (08-13-2004)

Phillip says:
THEY GOT A STAR ON HOLLYWOOD!

ABOUT TIME I SAY!!!!! (08-12-2004)

. says:
why does it bother you so much Richard? Stop coming if you don't like it. (08-08-2004)

jk says:
Hey Richard get lost. (08-08-2004)

Richard Cranium says:
Could somebody please answer me this: When the hell did a VINYL (records, albums, people) MUSEUM become a Dear Abby hotline for psychic cranks (Dean Craft), mayoral candidates for local trailer parks, etc?

Do a damn Google search and I'm sure there are TONS of psychic nincompoops out there JUST READY to suck in your hard-earned cash. Go ahead...free country.....but this IS a vinyl museum. RECORDS....LPs.....NOT shrinks, medicine men, etc.

But of course, most of you display your limited intelligence admirably when you post the same damn message THREE times....great....maybe the damn psychic can tell you when you'll be able to figure out how to use that damn mouse that's attached to your PC.

Have a great weekend, cretins and morons. I will be out fishing and have no further desire to read the endless meanderings of the feeble-minded.

Rich (08-06-2004)

Nathan N. (nancmend@yahoo.com) says:
Like so many others seeking help I to am desperately seeking a way to contact Dr. Craft if you can please e-mail it to above address I would be ever so grateful. (08-06-2004)

B Borg (mtborg@msn.com) says:
I saw your show on physic healing and would like to get in contact with Dean Craft. Please send me his address and phone number. (08-03-2004)

Carol A. Murphy (camurfy@hotmail.com) says:
Please send me Dean Craft's address so I can contact him for a friend who is almost completely paralyzed from ALS. Thank you. (08-03-2004)

Susan (crafts@svic.net) says:
I am in desperate need of Cindy's help. I need to find Dr.Dean Craft. Please help!08-02-04 (08-02-2004)

CHARLENE KALK (SHY1957@AOL.COM) says:
I also would like to know the address or phone number to Dean Craft...another charlene (08-02-2004)

BigL (bodywork1@earthlink.net) says:
Anybody know how to find out more about Dean Craft? (08-02-2004)

ojoaba (guyman @yahoo.co.uk) says:
ilove u guyman (06-25-2004)

Peanut Head says:
Have ya seen dis cover, babies??

Holy shite..wish I was a creamsicle da way Lapurne & Shelley be workin' dem over kinda sexy like....WOW....

Dese two chicks never even left da stoop...dey was jess sittin' dere wid them frozen dik candies an one day JAMMY OSMINDT cum over and dey was doin' him good onna stoop dere...den JAMMY says lets make an LP...so dey left da stoop fer awhile and sang some shit wid JAMMY dere...

I wud like fer Lap-earn & Shelley ta cum too my place fer smokes an liquour...den wid da poopsicles den we...oops...yes, Mommy??...(I haveta go...bye).... (05-15-2004)

Peyton Farquar says:
Help, I'm up on a plank on the Owl Creek Bridge and these Damn Yankees are gonna kick me off!
My last reqest was to hear 16 Reasons--but records haven't been invented yet. (04-14-2004)






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